Life: abundant and beautiful.

I'm becoming increasingly more aware that the people that are in my life make up a huge part of this "abundant life" thing. And, I LOVE it! While I've had really good friends and good people in my life for quite a long time I seem to be enjoying all this more.

The more time I spend with the people in my life the more I enjoy them. A few weeks ago I skipped "church" and instead went with my friend and her grandma to Cane Ridge. Sitting in the old log cabin and listening to Christine sing "I love thee" brought me to tears. We picnic-ed right next to old graves under the trees and at the end of the day we spent time laying in the grass enjoying the beauty of the earth. It was peace-filled and wonderful. This past weekend was an absolute blast with Kristen. We ate yummy Chicago-style pizza, listened to the amazing CSO, went shopping a lot, and got to ride on the 'L'. On the way up to Chicago we were listening to DtP. One song that always seems to draw me in is 'Perimeter of Me'.

(chorus)
And I want to live with wider eyes,
There's far too much to see
To think of nothing else
But where I've been and where I'll be
I've been longing for the freedom
That is waiting silently
In the life that's just beyond the small
Perimeter of me

*sigh* amazing stuff. I love Tuesday nights. My little brother visited with us. I'm not sure why but sometimes I just want to squeeze him like a big teddy bear. I miss spending time with him, even if he sometimes leaves bruises on my arm from flicking me. :-) After enjoying good company and good food Holly and I ventured up to Hamilton. I am constantly amazed by the talent that Justin and Tasha have. The time escaped us and it was time to leave far too soon. I can hardly wait til they put a new CD out so I can play it over and over. After they packed up we stopped at Steak n Shake to hang out. This was the first time I'd really ever gotten to hang out with Justin and Tasha outside of Tuesday night. It was only the second time Holly and I had hung out outside of small group. They're neat and I like them. :-)

Last night Holly made a comment about us having cool lives. I think she's right! I feel an overwhelming freedom and urgency to experience life. I might go to Chicago and enjoy the wonderfulness that is Dividing the Plunder. I might go to Europe and help people and travel around a bit with the Holly. I've been thinking more about this community living thing. Sounds like it would be very rewarding. Even if those things aren't able to happen it makes me very happy to think about them. God says, "Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious--the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse." Phillipians 4:8 (msg) I'd like to think that I'm doing that very thing. Or, umm, maybe I just really like traveling to cool places and loving people. I'm beginning to think that that is enough and even good.

Yah, life is good.

what are you doing this weekend?

my reply, "I don't know yet." Which was promptly followed by, "come up here."

crap. just when I think I'm starting to be okay with the way things are he goes and changes things. I had hoped we could still be friends and we have been able to, so far. Though, lately he has made comments about "us" and other things that make me believe he is at least thinking of getting back together. I don't know if I can really tell him "no, this won't work. not now, and probably not ever."

Even if he only wants me to visit as a friend I don't know if we're ready to do that yet. It would be extremely easy to fall back into all the cuddly-ness and all the good things of a relationship with him.

I told him we'd talk about it later. Indeed, if a visit is to happen anytime soon we need to do some serious talking and decide how to go about things. I can't stand the thought of going up there and screwing things up between us and not being able to be friends because of it.

I love this...

Woke up this morning and got ready. Kristen had Chicago-style stuffed pizza for breakfast. HA! I love this. :-)

A day in the life.....of ME!

Getting ready
Alarm clocks are annoying, yet necessary for me. Heard the first screeching beeps at 6:30 and then every nine minutes thereafter until I actually got out of bed to take a shower at 7:15. I hate taking showers in the morning cuz then my hair is still wet when I leave. Not that I actually fix it but I at least am able to brush it. After a quick shower I dashed into my room to scrounge some clothes among the mess that is my room. I hate how messy my room has become lately. I hope that the next round of packing will actually make it less cluttered than the first round made it. I decided on grey pants with my bright pinky- orange-y, paisley top. I need to find some new black shoes. maybe I'll hit payless today at lunchtime. ha, I've said that the last three days. oh well. It's 732 and I'm still not completely ready. No lunch is made which, at this point, isn't likely to happen now. I grab the things I need for after work. Lock my bedroom door and go into the kitchen. One look in the fridge tells me there isn't something I can just grab for breakfast or lunch. Darn it. Next stop is the bathroom again. Quickly brush my teeth and then try to detangle at least part of my hair. The time is now 744 and I have a good chance of being late.

The commute
I rush down my driveway and into the routine morning commute. No cops on 50 today. Didn't really matter, the people in front of me wouldn't let me go the speed limit anyway. Not much of anything good on the radio this morning. I settled for Celebration on 94.9 as I was pulling in the parking garage around 751. Found a fairly good spot. Remembered as I was walking in that I didn't have anything to eat for breakfast at work and a Paula's muffin sounded good. Stopped by what I thought would be a quick pitstop on my way to work ended up taking nearly 5 minutes with only one person in front of me. They raised their prices on muffins too. Darn them. Made it to my floor just to see my clock say 810. Figures.

Mundane morning.
As I turn my page in my calendar I once again notice that yesterday was (well, would have been) the one year anniversary of when Tim and I started dating. Well, the "official" one anyways. Maybe that's why he didn't call last night. haha, yeah right. I doubt he would have remembered. He probably stayed up too late watching tv or being on the computer and then was too tired. Doesn't matter too much just as long as he's ok. I slept pretty good last night. Six full hours. Impressive.

I pull up all my systems and programs and some websites that I need. Check my email and open my yahoo email. I still need to email Kristen soon.

857. my hair is still wet, my muffin is gone and I'm out of water. time to refill and get a dose of news from the newspaper in the breakroom.

After my daily morning chat with Mary and Marlene I head back to my desk. My screensaver is on which means I've been away for at least five minutes. It (hopefully) says "I love the world in the springtime" in French. Other languages fascinate me. One day I will put in enough effort to learn another language. Until then, I'll pretend with phrases like "la vita e' bella" and "j'aime le monde dans les" as my screensavers. Oh my gosh, I just looked up that phrase on yahoo and it doesn't actually mean I love the world in the springtime. It's close. wow! I suppose I should correct it now. "J'aime le monde dans le printemps"

I'm wasting time, aren't I? It is so easy to do. Alright. I must force myself to work now.
1019. Chris calls and said she fell down at work and is being taken to the hospital. I start to freak out a little, in my head. "Are you gonna be ok? Do you want me to come with you? Do you need me to drive you?" She says she'll be ok and that someone from work is driving her and she will call me later. Crap. three people that I know are in the hospital today. chris, grandma jo, and sarah. God, please take care of them.
I need to get away from my desk for a minute.

1044. Drinking a warm cuppa and loving it. mmmm.

1058. Pending. I hate it. It takes me so long to do one stupid file. Grrr. Why do I always get hungry around 1030? at least I'm not eating cheetos. One of those bags is 20 grams of fat. Thank God I don't have that ritual anymore. But, whoppers are calling my name. I need to start bringing healthy snacks into work. That way I'm not as likely to hit the vending machine. Good thing lunch isn't too far away. crap. I didn't bring lunch. hmm, I guess I could go to quizno's to grab a salad and eat the ziti freezer thing. I might do that. depends on what I feel like in 30 minutes.

1109. asked Jenny if I could leave at 1 tomorrow. She said, "sure, that should be fine" and then glanced at the calendar and said "yeah." and I said, "I'm going to Chicago!" :-) she replied, "ooooh, have fun!" She's such a great supervisor! and, I'm going to Chicago!!! with Kristen!!! How cool is that!!! Did I mention that I frequently use exclamation points. yeah.

Lunch and rambling
1151. back from quizno's. Stopped at payless with no luck. Well, I might have bought something if I had more time to actually look without feeling rushed. I passed lazarus on the way back and thought of that sapphire diamond bracelet for mom. I can't decide if I should get it. It is pretty inexpensive. Should I just wait to find something in Chicago? hmm. I'll have to think about it. Lunch is good. Ziti parm, caesar salad, and pineapple chunks. ha! no meat. That is a rare occasion for me.

1228. emailed Heather and Ayesha about Friday Fun Night. I'm sad that I'm gonna miss it. I really enjoy it.

1242. I can't concentrate on work. AGAIN. So, I'm off to check on everyone's blog. HA! Kristen updated! Yay! it'd been awhile. and it's about Chicago and stuff. awww. I'm looking forward to it too. :-)

1247. crap. I really need to quit updating and get some freakin' work done. alright. i'll post this now and i'll try to edit right before I leave work.

I'm back with more rambling

108. on the way back from the bathroom I saw Pam and her boys who stopped in to visit. Good to see her again. I wish she still worked here.

149. I'm feeling all anxious. I dunno why. I have a lot to get done tonight. I called Kristen and left a message a few minutes ago. I also called Christine and left a message to see if she was okay. Off to get more water and probably pee again. tmi, I'm sure.

231. my york peppermint patties are stale. yep, that's right....stale. I'm eating them anyway.
303. I'm working on a file and they live on Golden lane. :-) made me think of the Golden's that I know and love!

354. dang. I've had to go to the bathroom twice in the last hour. I've drank a lot of water today but that isn't too unusual. sheesh. People are gonna start thinking I have issues. I'm trying to listen to Dick Alexander on my CD player but it keeps cutting in and out. Guess I shouldn't have dropped it fifty times.

417. Chris called me back. They (urgent care) think that she tore a muscle in her arm. But, nothing is broken. Gram got out of surgery but the drs. were unable to fix her rotator cuff (crap, I don't think that's what they were trying to fix...but, I can't remember). There's nothing that I can do or even say to make things better. I'm supposed to be leaving for Chicago tomorrow but I want to be there for Christine in any way that I can.

433. I'm looking forward to having new roommates. I've learned a lot along the way. I'm also quite stressed about being able to pay the stupid electric bill. I have to write another letter to my roommates about the bill situation and about moving out. And, I have to write a letter to the landlord about moving out. fun stuff. I have to go to the bathroom again. I'm gonna try to hold it for at least 10 more minutes. this is insane. I am on my fourth (I think) bottle of water. Haha, so about 88 oz. of water. I'm impressed with that. Normally I only make it through 2 or 3 bottles while at work. The muffin must've made me thirsty. (a four word "m" alliteration!)

451. about to leave work now. Thinking about all the things I have to do tonight (it's gonna be a busy night!).

*stop at the gym for a quick workout since I haven't been since Monday.
*do a load of laundry (while at the laundrymat stop at the produce store)
*Watch survivor with Karen
*Pick up snacks from Kroger
*make phone calls. Ayesha, Naomi, Christina, Heather, and Christine.
*pack for Chicago.
*fall asleep :-)


There you have it, folks. This has been a day in the life of Dana. As much as it seems that I didn't get a lot of work done today I actually did. I wonder how many people will actually read this extrememly long post. hehe. I apologize if I have bored you to tears. :-)

I haven't had very much time to blog lately. I'm feeling the urge to vent majorly! Hopefully, that will pass soon enough. anywho, I'll be back sometime in the next week to blog a bit more of my life. ;-)

Why do we do the things we do

Maybe she has a point. Why pray? I got to thinking about it some and it kinda bothers me. If God is omniprescent (big Christian word for everywhere) and omnicient (another big Christian word for all-knowing) that I expect Him to be then why is it necessary that we pray for one another? How is my praying going to affect the outcome of their situation? I don't understand it. Does God say, "Well, okay Dana and 4 other people prayed for this. So, I guess it's important. Cindy can go on that trip now and that church can give her some money to fund it."

Please don't misunderstand me. I am (was?) convinced that prayer is a vital part of living in Christ. I have seen some amazing things happen as, what I thought, a result of prayer.

Anybody have any thoughts? I am probably coming off a bit more harsh than I'd like.



Crappy situation
A friend of a friend is in an abusive relationship. Finally, she has decided to get help and get out of the relationship. She planned to leave this weekend. Then, she found out she is pregnant. I have nothing against pregnancies, even unplanned ones. But, this just sucks. Even if she does decide to leave him, and I hope she does, she still has to deal with him and custody issues and child support and everything like that.

I want to go back to England
I really, really, really want to go back. There's this thing happening this summer in London called soul in the city put on by Soul Survivor UK. Basically, it is this huge outreach to the city of London. I would love to go back and participate in this and would love to meet up with old friends. I really hope it is possible. It would be the perfect opportunity to go this summer after I get laid off from work. I could do the temporary job thing for a month to fund the trip and then go. Sounds perfect, right? Yeah, I thought so too. :-)

I'm not entirely sure that I'm even looking forward to Easter. Well, I am excited about eating chocolate. It's been 44 days! Should I be mad at myself for being more excited about eating chocolate than spending time with my dad's family? I know that that isn't "Easter". Ben may be right, we've all heard it so much that it is hard to really get it. For me, Easter has never held a deep spiritual grip on my life. Now that I'm a believer, it's a little bit different. But, I still go from place to place forgetting what the whole thing was about in the first place, in all its busyness. I'm tired of feeling that way. By the end of the night I crash on my bed and think to myself, "Oh yeah, hey God, thanks for that amazing thing that you did for me" for a moment until I drift off to sleep only to start the next day with little reflection.

loads of fun!

I had loads of fun hanging out with Holly this weekend. She's great! We had a great time making dinner and chatting.

I have so much more to say.....but I must work right now. I'll be back later.


oh, and I got to see my nephew again on Sunday night. yep, he's still cute. Ang calls him "pumpkin" and Lyle doesn't want her too. It's cute. Lyle's called him Pumpkin a few times on accident. hehe.