Not worth it.

This may be my last entry in this blog. It isn't worth risking friendships for the sake of me writing out what I'm feeling, especially when I don't explain my feelings well enough so my words aren't taken the wrong way. My feelings, while important, are sometimes temporary and a result of something unrelated to where they tend to come out. I'm sorry if I have hurt you at any point with anything that I may have said. Hurting people is something I never intend and always try to avoid.

Just a dream

How dare her! She lied to me about working so much only to be prancing around at the pool all day long. Then, she left me waiting at her work for two hours! I found myself gliding through the air (somehow) impatiently looking for her car. I woke up frustrated, stressed, and very angry at my mom. It was just a dream.

Weird emotions today...

left out

I have this friend that lives in Florida and has lived there since August. I call her my best friend (though I'll never be her "best friend") and miss her tons since she has been away. Thankfully, she'll be back at the end of this month.

It was her birthday on Sunday and she had a party, with her "new" friends. While I know she hasn't forgotten me or anything it just hit a little harder not celebrating with her on her birthday and having her tell me how much fun she had without me. I know this probably sounds really selfish. It isn't that I want her to have a horrible time with these new people (and they are great!). I just don't want my friendship to be less important. I guess I'm just feeling a little left out of her life.

I feel special!

With bloggers new format I ended up back on the page where it has "blogs of note" and "blogs recently published". I'll likely never make it to the "blogs of note" but was delighted when I saw my little blog under the "blogs recently published". I suppose I shouldn't really be that surprised since I JUST posted...but, I have NEVER seen it before. :) heeee.

Waste of time...

It's 138 pm and our systems here at work have been down the entire day, up until a few minutes ago. They should've just let us go home. I'm very frustrated thinking of all the things I could be doing at home rather than sitting at work cleaning my desk and wasting time. I have to move in less than 3 weeks and my time could have been well used at home. Maybe I'll take Friday off. It's only Monday and I'm already thinking of the next time I have off work. Nearly six hours, wasted.

Dammit!

I'm more than a bit irrated at the moment. A week ago today I dropped off four rolls of film at Wal-mart to be developed. I stopped by Tuesday to pick them up and they weren't there yet. I stopped again on Weds and 3 of the 4 rolls were there. I called again today and the fourth roll is still MIA. I want my pictures!!!! Who else needs a 24 pictures of my baby nephew and average tourist-y pictures of Chicago?

It's crunch time

Yep, another email about work. It has been fairly chaotic around here lately. I gladly leave at the end of the day, most times feeling like not a whole lot was accomplished. Today has been one of those days. It is beginning to feel like it is "us" versus "them". US being the life specialists and our supervisor and a few other people. THEM being the agents. (can I just say "no, we will not give you an extension. We notified you in December that we would stop accepting applications on April 30th at 5pm EST. It is not my fault that you waited too late to send something in.") Also, THEM is now the underwriters. For some reason they think that we can order an APS (which has a typical turnaround time of 4-6 weeks and possibly longer) now and get it in on time to make a decision, issue the policy, have it delivered, and have all requirements back in by June 25th. I have never seen my supervisor pissed off. She is today. She isn't angry, just perturbed that exceptions are being made and APS' are still being ordered and other crazy things.

Even with all that, I'm gonna miss this place when I'm gone.

I've got a long way to go...

So, I received this signed ammendment and it has something hand-written on it, which makes it pretty much void. I look it over and think "What the hell? Grrr, what is he thinking?"

The ammendment says something like this:

question 4a:
Has anyone been to the doctor for a physical checkup within the last five years:

YES: applicant had check up on 07/03 and results were normal.

**then the agent or applicant wrote

NO

YES
**
I called the agent and asked him about it. He said the answers are NO, YES. I read it out to him.
"Has the applicant been to been to any doctor for physical checkup..." to which he said "NO" and then I said "But then it states....YES, physical checkup on 7/03"

he didn't have much of a reply. I finally just told him we weren't able to accept it and he would need to send a new ammendment in without anything written on it.

I hung up and immediately said "HE'S AN IDIOT!" more to myself than anyone else. Moments later I felt really unkind and like an idiot for being so unloving.

Ben, this is for you...

I drank some coffee last night. Granted it wasn't the straight up hard core black coffee. I ordered a hot caramel apple cider and the lady making it said I should try a caramel macchiato. She made me one for free (yah, wasn't gonna pay $3+ for something I wouldn't like). So, I tried it and it was pretty good. I could taste the coffee but it went well with the caramel and other flavors. I didn't drink more than 1/4 of it, but that was the first time I'd ever enjoyed drinking coffee. Ben, did you ever think it'd happen after all this time? hehe. ;-)
Just don't count on it ever happening again.