I know it's a movie...

But, I wish I had “someone” to pick me up from the airport like in the movie Love Actually. Lately, with all the weddings and everything else, I have been acutely aware that I don’t actually have someone to completely share my life with.

I’m flying home next Monday night and at the moment I don’t have a ride home. (This isn’t a plea for someone to pick me up) My mom is working, my dad will probably be out of town, my flight gets in too late to expect any of my friends to pick me up and that pretty much leaves me with taking a cab home, by myself.

Honestly I don’t think I am ready to be in a committed relationship (it doesn’t stop me from wanting that kind of relationship). I say that I am not ready not because I don’t feel that I can actually share my life with someone else but because there are so many things that I believe I need to wade through in my own life before I indulge someone else into this. Things that, I hope, will make me a better person and able to handle all my relationships in a healthier way.

“I’d rather swim the ocean
I’d rather not pretend
I’d rather do some thinking now
Somehow it all depends”…

“If I could fly away from me
To ride this wind above the trees
Oh to fly away from me
Come and face the longing
On my knees”…

“I’d rather never question things
But that’s the story of my life”..

“I’d rather not be crying
I’d rather just be whole
I’d rather brave the cleansing fire
I’d rather feed my soul”…

“I’m open to suggestions
I’m crying out to you
I’m ready to be finished here
I’m ready for this season to be through”

DTP, I’d Rather