number 202

Silence. I don't do well with silence when what I'm seeking is reassurance and comfort, and the person that I'm expecting comfort from is on the other end of a telephone too far away to offer an embrace. After getting really pissed off (hurt was the root of the emotion) and voicing my frustration we delved into a conversation that has bettered each of us. A week ago I would have told you that the relationship was crumbling, much like a lot of other relationships and beliefs have in the past few years. In the conversation I discovered that I think I am ready to begin digging deeper. I don't think it will come in the form of a daily devotional or in going to a traditional "church". What I think will happen is more of the same of what has been happening the last few years. Being with my people. Loving. Living as much and as fully as I'm able. and Being. I think I am ready to quit pushing it all away and simply become aware of why I'm pushing it away and begin to embrace it all.